| | wow so sophomore year is coming to an end. this year was probably one of the worst years of my life, right next to sixth grade. but i guess as you grow older you just stop caring about how much it sucked and just try to get a move on with it.
so this year i lost like 3625131624624 friends. mostly cause i was kinda quiet and distant and emo and tired all goddamn year long at school and just ignored everybody. i know i can't blame that on anybody but myself but i can't help but connect it to all the goddamn middle school drama that persists till high school, which is frankly quite fucking annoying. we all go to tech and it's like an invisible obligation to hang onto each other even though deep inside none of us want anything to do with the other person, specifically speaking, two people here.
so hm this year i lost a lotttt of my close friends. i don't know if "lost" is the right word, but things are definitely different. and everyone else, i just lost touch with. i used to think me and maggie would keep in touch till college but now i really doubt it. for some reason a lot of people seem to hate me this year--hate may not be the right word, but it sure seems that way sometimes. i can be a bitch, but it's not like you just found out. the thing i just don't understand from it all is that WHY, even to this goddamn day, like 5 years after i've met these people, why can't people accept my flaws? i know i'm fucking psychotic and i have the bitchiest outbreaks, but is that really a reason for you to just cut off all your ties with me? BESIDES the flaws that i have, BESIDES the goddamn fact that i am a scary ass bitch, i can be one of the kindest people too. i just don't know about that anymore. @_@ this whole 'discovering yourself' shebang is so confusing. whatever.
SO SUMMER IS GONNA START SOON AND I'M SO EXCITED TO BE AWAY FROM EVERYONE AND START OVER AND MEET NEW PEOPLE WHO DON'T KNOW ANYONE I KNOW SO THAT WAY PEOPLE CAN'T SAY SHIT ABOUT ME AND GET ALL DRAMATIC ABOUT EVERY LITTLE GODDAMN SHIT.
=] bye
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| | Posted 6/7/2009 4:07 PM - 2 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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